Wednesday, May 2, 2012

It's all about the blood...

Right now, on a blog far far away, a comment war is occurring.  My friend, Carol Howard Merritt, a pastor and writer, takes on the firecracker topic that's been labeled the "war on women." This is a topic that I have wanted to write about since it started but have lacked the courage to write or the desire to do the research to write a thorough piece. What you read below is Carol's response after a male commenter blasted her four times. Women in ministry get enough flack as it is (and I am not here to discuss that topic, this is my health blog), but the one thing men will never understand without a sex change operation is menstruation.

Carol's words need no further introduction. 

Do you know what it is like to bleed so profusely for two weeks straight that you become weak and anemic? Every time you stand up, you feel dizzy. Do you know what it’s like to have pains in your stomach that are so debilitating that you have a difficult time going to school or to work? Do you know what it is like to go through menopause, with incredible floods of blood that seem to come from nowhere, and frighten you even though you have been bleeding for over fifty years? Do you know what it’s like to have hormonal swings? Alongside the weakness, you have vacillation in body temperature, becoming hot or cold and feeling faint for no apparent reason. Do you know what it’s like to have depression and anxiety that creeps in regularly? You learn to manage it, aside from all the other pain. Do you know what it’s like to have surging, pounding migraines due to your menstrual cycle? A lot of girls begin going through this when they are nine years old, and many do not stop bleeding until they are fifty.

Do you know what it’s like to realize that one tiny pink pill could help with all of it?

There are some things that men will not understand. You cannot understand. Women have a different embodied experience. So it is difficult to hear men condemn women for using birth control, assuming that they will be using it as “a license to do things in the sexual realm that is counter to how things are supposed to be” (as Santorum said) or assuming that we will use the pill as an abortifacient (as you have done).

I imagine that is why many Evangelical women and Catholic women go against what their churches teach about birth control. We learned to ignore men when it comes to birth control, because a RC Bishop may understand a lot things, but he can never be an authority on what it’s like to menstruate.

Thank you, Carol, for saying what is on the minds and in the hearts of so many women.

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A little bloggy love for Carol's books can be found here. I have spent time with Carol in person and online and can vouch that she is of sane mind and a kind heart. I recommend her writing if you are interested in the church in modern times. 

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